December 16, 2011
It was a chilly winter morning and I was feeling so sick to get up and get ready for the office. However, I had to go, since the new company I joined required a highly dedicated Business Development Manager. Finally, I had to wake up.
I looked outside and there was a blanket of thick fog, even at 8:30 a.m. in the morning. I was getting ready and wearing my formal suit, with beige trousers and brown coat. My inner goddess said, wow you look like a professional manager now.
The ambition and passion with which I used to get up everyday dress up, was highly admired by my brother, who gradually had a school, while he bunked it for no reasons. After my dad left for his office, it was me who had to leave. It was a usual day. My grumpy mother gave me the lunchbox, and I left without eating a single grain.
I took out my cell-phone, but I wasn't really willing to call him. I needed space, and he was a fat-ass who had his habit of keeping an eye on me, no matter if I'm at work. He suffocated me. But as they say, "Think of the Devil, and There He Appears."
I always had regrets of being in a relationship with Nick, because he was completely sick. Nick was his surname, but Nikandar Arora had some really bad misconceptions about himself. He was a fat-man, with his belly growing 1 centimeters in diameter everyday. May be, his politician brother was the reason of his, so-called pride and arrogance.
Damn, the sneaky shit, bloody stalker..! Does he even sleeps, or is he always waiting outside my house to check, when I'm leaving, said my inner-self.
"Good Morning Madam", He said. He was riding his usual bike, and sometimes I wondered if his bike ever complained the way he sits, and puts all his weight. I felt so sorry for his bike. He offered me a ride to the bus-stop.
He stood there with me, till the bus arrived. No sooner did I board the bus, he left. I was relieved that it was just a 10-minute torture of being with him. I took the ticket to the last stop. I put on my head-phones, and started listening to some good tunes.
My cell-phone started ringing . Damn it...why can't he just leave me alone, said my inner goddess.
It was him. I had to take this call, since he was so possessive, which could make him think that I'm dating someone randomly in the bus.
I picked up, and said, "Hello, tell me."
He said, "You tell me, why were you so quiet today? Is there something wrong at home? Did you have a fight with your mother? I think we should get married as soon as possible. I can't see you suffering like this. You should live a comfortable life and I will go out and earn."
This two minute talk was so annoying that I felt screaming like mad, but I couldn't do anything, since I was in public.
I said, "There's nothing wrong in being quiet. My mother is grumpy that's it. This doesn't means I have to fight with her. Marriage...how many times, I have to tell you that I didn't sign up for such a relationship. I always told you that I'm neither serious, and nor am I interested in getting married. I'm just 22 years. It's time for me to become something. You're five years elder to me, look where you stand, so let me go and live peacefully..! "
I shut down the phone saying this. All the young girls travelling in the bus were looking at me, for the valor with which I spoke.
Damn, why can't these people mind their business.
My cell-phone rang again.
Son-of-a-bitch, he's going to get this bloody hard now, said my inner self.
I picked up. "Is this the way to talk to your husband?", Nick yelled.
I said, "Husband, excuse me? I'm not married. I'm just in a sick god-damn relationship, which suffocates me so much that I feel like dying. You've made my life hell. Just leave me.
Please... I beg you to leave me alone. I'm not the right girl for you. I won't be able to keep you happy. I'm a practical and open-minded woman. I don't like to be bound. I can't open up myself to you. Why can't you see that? Please let me go, Please.."
By the time he disconnected the call, I was sobbing. I tried to control my tears, but wasn't really able to do it. I blamed myself for getting into this situation.
If this is the beginning of the day, then what's gonna happen next?
The thought scared me a bit. Yet, I gathered my gut to remain in place. I started thinking about how everyday, I was getting deeper into his trap.
Soon, my stop arrived and I got off the bus. I was fumbling a bit, since Nick had already ruined my head, and I wasn't aware of the new workplace at all. As soon as I entered the reception, the receptionist asked my purpose of visit.
I said, "I'm a the new Business Development Manager, with the reference of Mr. Pandey."
She said, "Sorry, whose reference again?"
I said, "Mr. Onkar Pandey".
She checked the intercom, looked for his extension, and called him up.
While I was sitting at the reception, a man of probably thirties wearing dark grey suit, over a navy blue shirt and mauve tie, entered the reception. He was 5'10'' tall and wearing dark shade glasses. He asked for Mr. Vijaayan, who was the Director of the company. No sooner did the receptionist held the intercom for calling him, Mr. Vijaayan arrived at the reception asking for a file. He caught glimpse of the man wearing grey suit, and shook hands with him saying, "Hello Mr. Deswal, how are you doing? It's a pleasure having you with us. Please follow me."
While he was leaving from the reception area, he tried to make an eye contact with me, but I ignored, and he left. Meanwhile, Mr. Pandey came and shook hands with me. He was an average guy, who happened to be the Manager of the Sales Department. He took me to his cabin, where two men were already sitting.
He introduced me with those two men saying, "Ms. Vidhisha will be your reporting manager from now on. She will train you for sales and field visits. Also, she will accompany you during client acquisition. I want you guys to learn as much as you can, since I have worked with her. She's a sales shark."
Whatever Pandey said hardly mattered to me, since my mind was stuck at the reception. I was trying to figure out the kind energies that man possessed. After finishing his speech, he asked them to leave. Now, it was me and Mr. Pandey alone in his cabin.
He said, "Come on, let me introduce you to the Director. He'll be pleased to meet you."
With sheer excitement, Pandey opened the door of his cabin and asked me to follow him.
My inner goddess wondering, isn't that where Mr. Deswal would also be present this time?
The cabin of Mr. Vijaayan was a dark room with extremely dim lights, there was smell of agarbatti (joss stick). Mr. Vijaayan was busy talking to Mr. Deswal, while Pandey intervened them saying, "Sir..umm I wanted to introduce you to our new Business Development Manager."
Vijayyan said, "Sure, bring her in."
Vijayaan was a 50 year old man with a tough voice and a South Indian accent. He asked both of us to grab a chair.
Now I was sitting in between Mr. Deswal and Pandey. This was practically a situation, I didn't want to get into. I was never comfortable being the center of attraction, as I was always a loner wolf. Three men had their eyes on me, which means three different energies. While, it was difficult to figure out who was thinking what.
Being a scorpion, you can perhaps scan one at a time, but a she-wolf sitting between three predators, is not happening. I asked my inner goddess to shut-up for some time.
Watching my hand fumble, Deswal stood up and said, "I'll catch you in a minute sir, this is an important call."
That was a relief.
Mr. Vijayyan, "So welcome, Vidhisha. I have heard a lot from Pandey about your skills and experience in Business Development and Sales. You were the top target achiever in your previous company, and I expect you to do better than that. Good luck for your hardship, here with us. I have huge expectations from you."
He stood up and shook his hands with me. He accompanied me and Pandey out of the cabin, where Mr. Deswal was on a call.
He asked Deswal to join him back. That was the second attempt, Deswal tried to make and eye contact, but this time I was lost in thoughts.
My inner goddess was furious over the word "expectations". Bullcrap..! why do everybody has so much of expectations from me on this earth? My parents, Nick, and now this Vijayyan. all of them appeared as enemies to me standing with their spears across the battlefield, and waiting to attack me along on the either side. This was another suffocation of life. But, I couldn't do anything.
Pandey accompanied me to his cabin and said, "Okay so, this will also be your cabin from now on. Both of us will sit together, and devise strategies. You can call the executives in the meeting room and give them training."
In my head this was like a stranger man saying, okay lady, this is the only bed on earth we've got and we'll share it. We'll sleep together, have babies, and decide whether to have more or not.
Pandey's exaggeration on emphasizing the fact that we'll share the cabin, was a red alert to me. He was a cunning man though, but I had to ensure his intentions.
I spent 2 hours training those two schmucks, who didn't even know what industry they were into. I wasn't sure, if anything had gotten into their heads, as while training, it appeared as if I was talking to dead skeletons. Perhaps, they were not able to understand fluent English. Their faces were pale and blank, as if it were a horror show. Though, they knew how to write, and so, they did, what a student of Eighth grade usually does. They made notes of everything written on the board.
It was lunch time, and I reached back to the cabin. Pandey was out for lunch. There was no one on the floor. It was quiet, silent, and soothing for me. I rested my head against the desk and closed my eyes for 10 minutes.
After ten minutes, when I woke up, I found Deswal sitting across the desk, gazing me as if he won a treasure hunt. I was completely flabbergasted, as this was unexpected.
My inner goddess, what the hell is he doing here? How come he took advantage of the situation? I should get up and go..Oh no..that would be insulting. May be, I should see what he wants to say. Bloody Pervert.!
Deswal said,"Hi Vidhisha, you're quite famous in the office."
I said,"Huh?"
"Yes.., Pandey has been proudly bragging to achieve highest target by the end of this month. What have you done to him? The man has blind faith in you. If I were him, then I would be the last man to brag about you and would have kept you as my secret weapon", said Deswal.
With my complete ego I said, "Perhaps, he is simply confident about the strategy that we have worked out. Don't worry sir that will be taken care of. We make a great team."
My inner goddess, what the hell am I saying. Pandey is an ass-hole.
Deswal might have figured that out my facial expressions were contradictory with my words.
He said, "Anyway, Good luck with your team. My personal advice to is that this isn't the right place for you."
He gave me his visiting card and said, "In case, you change your mind to switch. I have some good contacts in the banking industry. A sophisticated woman like you should work for a reputed bank, and not for a third class broker."
He stood up and left in anger. He gave me too many questions and reasons to think that why I shouldn't be there.
This was a perhaps the only man in the world, who challenged my wits and forced me to think upon every word he said in those five minutes. I never knew that those fives minutes were destined to change my life.
I looked outside and there was a blanket of thick fog, even at 8:30 a.m. in the morning. I was getting ready and wearing my formal suit, with beige trousers and brown coat. My inner goddess said, wow you look like a professional manager now.
The ambition and passion with which I used to get up everyday dress up, was highly admired by my brother, who gradually had a school, while he bunked it for no reasons. After my dad left for his office, it was me who had to leave. It was a usual day. My grumpy mother gave me the lunchbox, and I left without eating a single grain.
I took out my cell-phone, but I wasn't really willing to call him. I needed space, and he was a fat-ass who had his habit of keeping an eye on me, no matter if I'm at work. He suffocated me. But as they say, "Think of the Devil, and There He Appears."
I always had regrets of being in a relationship with Nick, because he was completely sick. Nick was his surname, but Nikandar Arora had some really bad misconceptions about himself. He was a fat-man, with his belly growing 1 centimeters in diameter everyday. May be, his politician brother was the reason of his, so-called pride and arrogance.
Damn, the sneaky shit, bloody stalker..! Does he even sleeps, or is he always waiting outside my house to check, when I'm leaving, said my inner-self.
"Good Morning Madam", He said. He was riding his usual bike, and sometimes I wondered if his bike ever complained the way he sits, and puts all his weight. I felt so sorry for his bike. He offered me a ride to the bus-stop.
He stood there with me, till the bus arrived. No sooner did I board the bus, he left. I was relieved that it was just a 10-minute torture of being with him. I took the ticket to the last stop. I put on my head-phones, and started listening to some good tunes.
My cell-phone started ringing . Damn it...why can't he just leave me alone, said my inner goddess.
It was him. I had to take this call, since he was so possessive, which could make him think that I'm dating someone randomly in the bus.
I picked up, and said, "Hello, tell me."
He said, "You tell me, why were you so quiet today? Is there something wrong at home? Did you have a fight with your mother? I think we should get married as soon as possible. I can't see you suffering like this. You should live a comfortable life and I will go out and earn."
This two minute talk was so annoying that I felt screaming like mad, but I couldn't do anything, since I was in public.
I said, "There's nothing wrong in being quiet. My mother is grumpy that's it. This doesn't means I have to fight with her. Marriage...how many times, I have to tell you that I didn't sign up for such a relationship. I always told you that I'm neither serious, and nor am I interested in getting married. I'm just 22 years. It's time for me to become something. You're five years elder to me, look where you stand, so let me go and live peacefully..! "
I shut down the phone saying this. All the young girls travelling in the bus were looking at me, for the valor with which I spoke.
Damn, why can't these people mind their business.
My cell-phone rang again.
Son-of-a-bitch, he's going to get this bloody hard now, said my inner self.
I picked up. "Is this the way to talk to your husband?", Nick yelled.
I said, "Husband, excuse me? I'm not married. I'm just in a sick god-damn relationship, which suffocates me so much that I feel like dying. You've made my life hell. Just leave me.
Please... I beg you to leave me alone. I'm not the right girl for you. I won't be able to keep you happy. I'm a practical and open-minded woman. I don't like to be bound. I can't open up myself to you. Why can't you see that? Please let me go, Please.."
By the time he disconnected the call, I was sobbing. I tried to control my tears, but wasn't really able to do it. I blamed myself for getting into this situation.
If this is the beginning of the day, then what's gonna happen next?
The thought scared me a bit. Yet, I gathered my gut to remain in place. I started thinking about how everyday, I was getting deeper into his trap.
Soon, my stop arrived and I got off the bus. I was fumbling a bit, since Nick had already ruined my head, and I wasn't aware of the new workplace at all. As soon as I entered the reception, the receptionist asked my purpose of visit.
I said, "I'm a the new Business Development Manager, with the reference of Mr. Pandey."
She said, "Sorry, whose reference again?"
I said, "Mr. Onkar Pandey".
She checked the intercom, looked for his extension, and called him up.
While I was sitting at the reception, a man of probably thirties wearing dark grey suit, over a navy blue shirt and mauve tie, entered the reception. He was 5'10'' tall and wearing dark shade glasses. He asked for Mr. Vijaayan, who was the Director of the company. No sooner did the receptionist held the intercom for calling him, Mr. Vijaayan arrived at the reception asking for a file. He caught glimpse of the man wearing grey suit, and shook hands with him saying, "Hello Mr. Deswal, how are you doing? It's a pleasure having you with us. Please follow me."
While he was leaving from the reception area, he tried to make an eye contact with me, but I ignored, and he left. Meanwhile, Mr. Pandey came and shook hands with me. He was an average guy, who happened to be the Manager of the Sales Department. He took me to his cabin, where two men were already sitting.
He introduced me with those two men saying, "Ms. Vidhisha will be your reporting manager from now on. She will train you for sales and field visits. Also, she will accompany you during client acquisition. I want you guys to learn as much as you can, since I have worked with her. She's a sales shark."
Whatever Pandey said hardly mattered to me, since my mind was stuck at the reception. I was trying to figure out the kind energies that man possessed. After finishing his speech, he asked them to leave. Now, it was me and Mr. Pandey alone in his cabin.
He said, "Come on, let me introduce you to the Director. He'll be pleased to meet you."
With sheer excitement, Pandey opened the door of his cabin and asked me to follow him.
My inner goddess wondering, isn't that where Mr. Deswal would also be present this time?
The cabin of Mr. Vijaayan was a dark room with extremely dim lights, there was smell of agarbatti (joss stick). Mr. Vijaayan was busy talking to Mr. Deswal, while Pandey intervened them saying, "Sir..umm I wanted to introduce you to our new Business Development Manager."
Vijayyan said, "Sure, bring her in."
Vijayaan was a 50 year old man with a tough voice and a South Indian accent. He asked both of us to grab a chair.
Now I was sitting in between Mr. Deswal and Pandey. This was practically a situation, I didn't want to get into. I was never comfortable being the center of attraction, as I was always a loner wolf. Three men had their eyes on me, which means three different energies. While, it was difficult to figure out who was thinking what.
Being a scorpion, you can perhaps scan one at a time, but a she-wolf sitting between three predators, is not happening. I asked my inner goddess to shut-up for some time.
Watching my hand fumble, Deswal stood up and said, "I'll catch you in a minute sir, this is an important call."
That was a relief.
Mr. Vijayyan, "So welcome, Vidhisha. I have heard a lot from Pandey about your skills and experience in Business Development and Sales. You were the top target achiever in your previous company, and I expect you to do better than that. Good luck for your hardship, here with us. I have huge expectations from you."
He stood up and shook his hands with me. He accompanied me and Pandey out of the cabin, where Mr. Deswal was on a call.
He asked Deswal to join him back. That was the second attempt, Deswal tried to make and eye contact, but this time I was lost in thoughts.
My inner goddess was furious over the word "expectations". Bullcrap..! why do everybody has so much of expectations from me on this earth? My parents, Nick, and now this Vijayyan. all of them appeared as enemies to me standing with their spears across the battlefield, and waiting to attack me along on the either side. This was another suffocation of life. But, I couldn't do anything.
Pandey accompanied me to his cabin and said, "Okay so, this will also be your cabin from now on. Both of us will sit together, and devise strategies. You can call the executives in the meeting room and give them training."
In my head this was like a stranger man saying, okay lady, this is the only bed on earth we've got and we'll share it. We'll sleep together, have babies, and decide whether to have more or not.
Pandey's exaggeration on emphasizing the fact that we'll share the cabin, was a red alert to me. He was a cunning man though, but I had to ensure his intentions.
I spent 2 hours training those two schmucks, who didn't even know what industry they were into. I wasn't sure, if anything had gotten into their heads, as while training, it appeared as if I was talking to dead skeletons. Perhaps, they were not able to understand fluent English. Their faces were pale and blank, as if it were a horror show. Though, they knew how to write, and so, they did, what a student of Eighth grade usually does. They made notes of everything written on the board.
It was lunch time, and I reached back to the cabin. Pandey was out for lunch. There was no one on the floor. It was quiet, silent, and soothing for me. I rested my head against the desk and closed my eyes for 10 minutes.
After ten minutes, when I woke up, I found Deswal sitting across the desk, gazing me as if he won a treasure hunt. I was completely flabbergasted, as this was unexpected.
My inner goddess, what the hell is he doing here? How come he took advantage of the situation? I should get up and go..Oh no..that would be insulting. May be, I should see what he wants to say. Bloody Pervert.!
Deswal said,"Hi Vidhisha, you're quite famous in the office."
I said,"Huh?"
"Yes.., Pandey has been proudly bragging to achieve highest target by the end of this month. What have you done to him? The man has blind faith in you. If I were him, then I would be the last man to brag about you and would have kept you as my secret weapon", said Deswal.
With my complete ego I said, "Perhaps, he is simply confident about the strategy that we have worked out. Don't worry sir that will be taken care of. We make a great team."
My inner goddess, what the hell am I saying. Pandey is an ass-hole.
Deswal might have figured that out my facial expressions were contradictory with my words.
He said, "Anyway, Good luck with your team. My personal advice to is that this isn't the right place for you."
He gave me his visiting card and said, "In case, you change your mind to switch. I have some good contacts in the banking industry. A sophisticated woman like you should work for a reputed bank, and not for a third class broker."
He stood up and left in anger. He gave me too many questions and reasons to think that why I shouldn't be there.
This was a perhaps the only man in the world, who challenged my wits and forced me to think upon every word he said in those five minutes. I never knew that those fives minutes were destined to change my life.
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